Adam and the Suicide Girl
by theheathen42
Summary: A hopefully nonepic love story about Adam and the Suicide Girl who broke his heart... because I just love Adam.
1. First Impressions

**Author's Note:** _Before I start, let me just say that I don't really know all that much about the Suicide Girls or the website. I mean, I know the basics. I've never paid to see what all is on the site, and I've never been a model for it nor known anyone who was a model for it, so if you know more about it than I do, please bear with me. This is just fluffy fiction because I have a crush on Adam, and I really think he deserves to get a little action now and then. :D_  
**Adam and the Suicide Girl Chapter One: First Impressions**

"Good book?" asked a light, female voice from somewhere above him.

Adam blinked then looked up from his book to see a short, plaid miniskirt and fishnet stockings that disappeared into sturdy black boots, the likes of which were more likely to be seen on soldiers attacking a beachhead than on a young woman with legs like the ones he was seeing. Pushing his luck, he let his gaze wander back upwards and took in the bright red suspenders, the cropped white t-shirt, and the Marvin the Martian tattoo poking just above the waistband on her right hip. Adam gulped, then looked back down at his book. _She's not talking to me. There's no way in the world that a girl with a body like that is talking to me. No girl in fishnet stockings and tattoos would be interested in a book about math and linguistics and artificial intelligence._

Suddenly, one of the large black boots he'd just glimpsed in his quick scan ahead of him lifted itself from the floor of the subway and inserted itself between his thighs to rest on the seat. Adam gulped again. _Oh god. She's going to kill me._ He risked a glance upwards, this time looking high enough to see her face, but his gaze was blocked by an open book. **GEB** proclaimed the front cover. Godel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Braid. She was reading the same book he was.

"Whoa," he whispered.

"Whoops! Am I flashing the beav again?" the girl asked, moving one hand from her book and using it to hold her skirt down. "Sorry about that."

_Flashing the… _"What?" Adam asked, thoroughly confused.

The book snapped closed and disappeared into a messenger bag that the mystery girl had slung over her torso and hanging off her back. The boot made its way back down to the floor and Adam followed it with his eyes, still trying to process this strange meeting.

"It's been nice chatting with you," came the voice again. He looked up quickly, but she was turning away from him, and all he could see was a shock of bright pink hair embedded in a mane of black. "This is my stop, but maybe I'll see you here again, sometime." Her head turned back to look at him over her shoulder and he saw a flash of green eye, heavy with makeup and topped by a ring in its eyebrow. "Like tomorrow?"

All he could do was nod mutely watch as she laughed and exited the train.

_What just happened?_

* * *

Eve chuckled to herself as she left the train and headed to campus. _What is it with me and the shy ones, anyway? _Shaking her head, she waved to Dave, who was manning the coffee cart, as per usual. _They do look really cute when they're shocked, though. That's probably it._ She slipped Dave a $5 and grabbed her usual soy Chai latte and bagel with cream cheese, continuing on her way to her Cognitive Science lecture with barely a pause in her step. She bit her lip as she smiled at the memory of the look on his face when her boot got dangerously close to his ... personal space.

"Well, we'll just see what happens tomorrow, won't we?" she whispered to herself before pushing open the classroom door and greeting her friends.


	2. Appearances

**Chapter Two: Appearances**

_This is ridiculous._ Adam tossed aside another t-shirt as being "too nerdy." _She was just messing with me. She won't even remember me._ Sighing, he reached down and plucked a plain, navy blue shirt out of the pile of discards and put it on with a hoodie over top. _Might as well be comfortable, right?_. Running his fingers through his mop of curls, he grabbed his bookbag and keys from the table and stepped into his shoes.

* * *

Eve regarded her closet with a careful eye. _Yesterday, I was definitely too much for him. He just didn't know how to handle me, and I guess I can understand that._ She flipped through a series of mini-skirts, discarding each one in turn. _I should be more approachable if I don't want him to run away from me._ Her eyes fell on a pair of green army pants. _Hmmm... not bad._ Slipping them on, she let them fall over the tops of her big, black boots instead of tucking them in, as usual. _Okay, waist-down is now covered. No, waist-up..._ She started dismissing her cropped t-shirts, but then realised that she did want to attract him a little, after all. Pulling out a plain, black, golf-style t-shirt that was cut to just show off her belly button, she nodded to herself in satisfaction. _Cute, but not so sexy as to make his brain self- destruct._ She put on a pair of black suspenders with pink skulls on them and put her hair up in a ponytail. Picking up her bag and her keys, she headed off to see if she could track him down, again.

* * *

Adam sat on the subway, reading nervously. He shifted in his seat and frequently looked up from his book to take a "casual" look around the car. _See? She's not here._ He found himself strangely disappointed. He hadn't even said more than two words to her (literally), and yet here he was, wishing he could see her again.

He was jostled out of his reverie by someone squeezing into the seat next to him. Not paying much attention, he shuffled over a bit in his seat and glanced around the car again. _Where is she?_

"Looking for someone?" a soft voice whispered in his ear.

Adam jumped and his head whipped around to come face to face with a pair of sparkling green eyes and an eyebrow ring. "Y-y-... you!" he managed to get out. _Smooth._

_He really **is** cute._ "Me!" Eve replied, cheerfully. "Didja miss me?" she pouted sweetly, blinking her eyelashes and utterly failing to look innocent.

"I-I-I..." Adam waved a hand helplessly, horrified by his own inability to speak. Usually, his problem was speaking too much.

"My name's Eve," she said, holding out a hand in greeting. _Poor guy. He's **really** choking hard._

Adam choked slightly. _Eve? Her name's **Eve**?_. Holding out his own slightly sweaty hand, he shook hers, limply. "Adam," he whispered hoarsely.

"Seriously?" she asked, surprised. _What are the odds?_ He nodded miserably, waiting for the inevitable joke, but none came. "Well, we must just be meant to be, then!" she laughed.

_Wait... what?_ "Meant to..."

"My stop's next, but here," she pressed a piece of paper into his hand. "Call me, okay?" _If you can do that, then we might just have a shot at something. If you can't, well... we're not meant to be, after all._

Adam stared down at the phone number in his hand. _A hot chick just gave me her phone number with no prompting from me. I have officially entered the Twilight Zone._ He looked up at Eve as she stood up from her seat. "Are you sure you..."

"Ball's in your court, Adam." Eve smiled down at his confusion. "I've done the hard part. The next bit is up to you." _I wonder if he'll do it..._. "Anyway, it was nice meeting you... Adam." Leaning down, she gave him a kiss on the cheek and then turned to leave the train. "Enjoy your book!" she called, as the doors closed.

Adam reached up and gingerly touched the sticky gloss print on his cheek. _She kissed me! And she gave me her number! And **she kissed me!**_ Adam grinned foolishly around the subway car, then settled back down to try to read his book. He kept a death-grip on her phone number.


	3. The Call

**Chapter Three: The Call**

Eve sat at her desk in Philosophy class and doodled in her notebook. _Odds that he'll actually get up the nerve to call me? Probably 50/50. Odds that he'll be able to form a complete sentence when he does?_ She smiled and drew a little heart with curlicues all around it.

* * *

Adam looked around the locker room twice, checked all of the shower stalls, gave the room another once over, then carefully and reverently withdrew the slip of paper from his wallet, where he'd tucked it in between his driver's license and his library card. Glancing up nervously, he looked around again before taking a deep breath and dialing.

** 5... 5... 5...**

"Hey! Adam, right?" came a loud, New York accent behind him.

_Shit!_ Adam jumped guiltily and flipped his cellphone closed, quickly hiding the precious slip of paper back in his wallet. Turning toward the voice, he stood up and waved a hand awkwardly in greeting. "Yeah, hi!" _What was his name, again?_ "You're...?"

"Danny," the other man said, holding out a hand in greeting. "We met for about three seconds last week when Mac first gave you the tour."

"Ohhh yeah, I remember," Adam replied, shaking the profferred limb. "You were getting trace off some clothing with a woman who looks kind of like a cross between Penelope Cruz and a young Sophia Loren." _I just **had** to get a job at the lab with all of the pretty people. I couldn't just go work with the Dork Squad and be considered hot by comparison. **Noooo.**_

Danny blinked for a minute before it clicked. "Ohhh, you mean _Aiden_!" he laughed. "What? You wanna hit that?" He gave Adam a skeptical once over. "Fair warnin': she's a cop, a New Yorker, and she's Italian. If she ain't interested, just let it go."

_I wonder if he's speaking from experience, there?_ "Actually, I've got a girlfriend." _Dumb. Stupid. Idiotic. Sonofa..._

"Oh yeah?" Danny laughed and touched his cheek. "Actually, I'd kinda already guessed that." He closed his locker, having fetched whatever it was that he was looking for. "Anyway, I'll see y'around. Alright?"

"You bet!" Adam answered with more enthusiasm than he really felt. _Great. A week on the job, and I'm already lying through my teeth._ Reaching up, he tried once more to wipe Eve's lipgloss from his cheek. _What is this stuff? Glue?_

* * *

** 5... 5... 5...9... 3...**

_Oh God. I can't do this._ Adam closed his phone in a sudden panic and looked around his apartment for a distraction. He'd decided to wait until he got home so that he could make the call with some degree of privacy, but now the eerie amounts of quiet were getting to him. _What if I get her voicemail? I suck at voicemail! I'll panic and start talking and won't stop and then she'll think I'm some sort of psycho loser stalker insane rapist murderer who can't even leave a stupid voicemail without cracking up!_

Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to walk around his apartment until his breathing returned to normal. _She's just a girl._ Deep breath. _It's just a phone call_. Deep breath. _I'm just calling to ask her... to ask her..._ his breathing hitched again and he sat down quickly on the couch and put his head between his knees. _Oh God. I can't do this._

* * *

** 5... 5... 5... 9... 3... 2...**

Adam closed his phone and buried his face in a pillow to let out a frustrated scream. "GRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRR!"

Punching the pillow a few times, he took a deep breath and sat up in bed once more. _I can do this. This can be done. This is a totally doable thing I'm going to do. Riiiiight... NOW!_ He stared at his phone in an agony of indecision. He thought he might vomit. No wait, he was going to piss himself. No, no... vomit. Definitely vomit.

He dashed off to the bathroom.

* * *

"mmmmello?" Eve mumbled into her cell phone. Lifting her face out of her pillow she squinted at her alarm clock. _4am? This better be good._

"..."

"'ello?" she yawned, brushing the hair out of her eyes and sitting up. "If this is some sort of perverted attempt at phone sex, do you think you could call back on Friday? It's just that I have to wake up early tomorrow for class, and I..."

"ADAM!" her eyes opened wide from the shock of both the volume and the message itself. _Wow! He did it!_ She looked at her clock again. _Now, if only he'd done it, say, five hours ago._

"Adam? Subway Adam? Cute, geeky, unable to utter a complete sentence Adam with the good taste in books?" _Easy girl, be gentle._

"..." This time, there was a sort of affirmative-sounding squeak that, while unable to be represented by mere typography, was clearly released from the throat of a shy, desperate, human male who has just realised that he's calling a gorgeous woman he barely knows at an ungodly hour of the night.

Eve smiled to herself and settled back onto her pillows. "So, how've you been?" she asked, solicitously, as if it weren't 4am and he hadn't just woken her from a wonderful dream involving herself, Adam Brody, and a complete lack of clothing. _C'mon, baby. Gimme something to work with, here._

"I threw up." Eve managed to stifle her laughter, but she almost lost it when she heard the clear sound of a hand thwapping a forehead followed by a whispered curse. "I mean... I'm good."

"I'll definitely agree with that one," she flirted outrageously. _Make it **painfully** obvious, and he'll **have** to do something._

There was a deep breath on the other end of the line, and then she was bowled over by the sheer number of syllables she was bombarded with. "So, I was calling because I was wondering, and I know that maybe you didn't mean to imply this when you gave me your number, but I think that maybe you **did** mean to imply it, and so I wanted to know if you'd mind if I wanted to maybe ask you out. On a date, I mean. And when I say date, I don't mean that I want to just take you somewhere and have sex with you. Um. I mean, I **do** want to have sex with you. A lot. But... Oh crap. I don't mean that I **just** want to have sex with you, I mean that I want to have a date with you and maybe have sex with you... sometime... if you want to... and... Can I start over please?" He took another deep breath, and Eve jumped on the chance to get a word in edgewise.

"Tomorrow night? Dinner?" _Well, he can talk, after all. Who'da thunk it?_

"..." another affirmative squeak followed by a clearing of the throat and an overly-masculine voice reiterating. "That'd be great."

"Meet at the subway station at 96th?

"I'll see you there."

_Huh. A date with Adam._ Settling back down under her covers, Eve allowed herself a laugh. _This is going to be fun._


End file.
